I love the farm in Hoskote

 Twenty five chickoo trees today on the property, with another 25 mango, starfruit, jamuns, jackfruit, aamla, avocado, lychee, pomegranate and tamarind trees.

 I love the 2 acre farm in Hoskote. Over 30 years ago my son David was in his French class and his teacher Miss Davenport said, “ Boys, I have a farm and want to sell it. Ask your parents to contact me if anyone wants to buy."

Narsimappa and me put down FIVE Sour Sop seedling and three avocado's! We already have avocados which fruit.

My boy knowing how keen his mother was to have a small piece of farmland, to grow all the fruit trees her heart desired, pricked up his ears. 

“ Yes Miss! My mother is very keen on buying some farmland if it is reasonably priced.” Said my careful eldest immediately when she went to call his mother.    

Siblings of Dad's rose-apple in a bucket from the Basha's compound

Ms Davenport called -- “ Marianne I have a 2 acre plot in Hoskote which belongs to Barbra Webster's brother who just died in the UK. We are wanting to sell it. David says you are interested. Are you?”

My heart began to beat rapidly -- “ Yes I am, BUT what is your asking price. I can only pay a small sum from my pre-school savings.”

“ We want 80 thousand for it and you will pay the registration and lawyers fees,” said Davenport as quickly as she could.

Crop of avrekkai to fix nitrogen in the soil

“ Yes! I will buy it,” I said without even seeing the property in my usual impulsiveness and naivety. “ When can we register it?”

“We can look at next week if you are ready,” said Davenport.

“ I need to collect the funds and contact Carlos Dacosta, my Dads lawyer and it will be bought in my Dad’s name,” I said.

The documents were sent to Dacosta and he called and told me that the plot docs were fine and we could buy it. Excitement broke forth and Dad was more excited than me. "Make a separate bank account where only this money is put," he advised and so I began the collecting from all I had saved up. Pre-school, advertising agency -- the works.

Star fruit loaded with fruit which I make into a delicious juice.

We went and registered the plot in the Hoskote municipal office and then all of us along with the lawyer, went to the land to eat the delicious sandwiches and drink the coffee brought by Ms Davenport and Barbra Webster, sitting on the land. That was my first glimpse of the property and my heart sank and I looked aghast at my Dad and Mum in shock. This was not a farm, it was a mess.

The land was badly eroded, no fencing, planted with eucalyptus and I stood there unable to move. Anyway we ate the sandwiches and drank the coffee while my mind raced about what to do.

“ Don't worry we can work it up,” said Dad. “What do you expect to get for 80 thousand? I have other things on my mind regarding the property. Remember -- At the end of the road there is always a mirror,” he said cryptically.

Once they reached home, the phone rang and Dad said, “ Tomorrow I have made an appointment to see Dacosta. I am making my will.”

“ What's the hurry Dad?” she asked her father. 

Rain Water Harvesting in the property. No wastage of precious water.

“ The property is in my name, tomorrow if something happens to me your siblings will fight for it,” he said, genuinely concerned.

“ Never Dad! All of them know I have bought and paid for it with my money, why are you worried?” I asked.

“ I have seen families disintegrate over property that's why my Dad divided everything up with no joint ownership,” he said. Cryptic words indeed.

The Ixora which we brought from a Goa nursery

So the next day, we walked down to Dacosta’s office, with Dads draft will written by hand, as was done in those days and got it registered. Dad said I hereby bequeath the Hoskote plot to my daughter for her sole use. So many years later a lawyer reading it said -- “you are very lucky getting a farm from your Dad?”

And I said, “Yes! Aren’t I?? “

The handsome Cockerel who patrols the property with his brood of hens!

Dad's words echoed in my ears, I realised what mirror he was talking about at the end of the road! Today one has to take into account spouses who come from different backgrounds who could have been a problem, thirty years later! I can't thank him enough.
   

A great choice on NETFLIX

 Enjoying this series about a surly doc Dr. Martin Ellingham (Martin Clunes), a socially challenged doctor who moves from London to the picturesque village of Port Wenn in Cornwall. NETFLIX.

Decided to switch and watch The Fall a BBC crime drama series with Gillian Andersen in the lead set in Belfast --Northern Ireland. Pretty gripping especially since the perpetrator is an intelligent criminal. NETFLIX

A craggy lawman ( Jeff Bridges) who is a law unto himself and a Texas Ranger ( Matt Damon) wearing spurs -- don't miss watching True Grit ( 2011) Apparently theres a '60's original starring John Wayne. Netflix. We LOVED it !

Watching The Sinner a series on NETFLIX. Frighteningly unpredictable and led by powerful performances from a talented cast, the darkly compelling series grabs your interest fast and doesn't let go.

Quite unexpected -- I just clicked on the link 'cause I saw Bullock, Reeves and Christopher Plummer imagine!! And thoroughly enjoyed it --

Fantasy romance about a relationship that forms between an architect and the doctor who lived in his new lakeside house two years previously. Only able to communicate by passing letters into the house's mailbox, the pair begin to fall for each other, but will they ever be together?

Hollywood remake of the acclaimed South Korean film `Siworae'.

A 2011 action thriller film which we quite enjoyed. The film stars Taylor Lautner in the lead role alongside Lily Collins, Alfred Molina and Sigourney Weaver in supporting roles.

I thought the young guy ( Lautner) in the lead was pretty convincing and the film was worth watching.

If you dont mind just reading the captions -- Deadwind on NETFLIX is an interesting and thrilling series from Finland mixing crime investigation and personal drama.

Thoroughly enjoyable and quite unlike any of the typical Sherlock Holmes films dont miss Enola ( alone spelled backwards!)Holmes streaming on NETFLIX. A 2020 film.

The role of an executor of a will

 

Many years ago when I was much younger, my father called me over one day, to his house, to make me sign and agree to being executor of his will along with my brother. All I felt good about then was, he had put my name before my brothers which showed his respect for me as his daughter, inspite of his own parents making differences between women and men in their wills. However he did not realise that the brother would try his macho bullying  tricks many years later. But I am well equipped to take on bullies.

Infact I saw a letter signed by my mother agreeing to rescind all her legal holding on my maternal grandfather's property when he died. It shocked me as my parents never made any such distinction. She explained very matter-of-factly that girls got dowry’s and went to the man's house for the rest.

But over the years my parents saw that my husband and I were always there for them and it was only when I went to study that the equations changed. My parents realised my  spouse was weak and I had three boys to bring up with hardly any money. So, thankfully they left everything equally to us all.

So what does an executor do? Why is an executors position so important when disposing of a will? My lawyers, Vivek Britto, Nimisha Kumar and Jadgeesha KN, my perky and smart criminal lawyer took time to explain and show me the importance of the role. Sadly, even the Bank Manager had to be rapped on the knuckles by the RBI Ombudsman and her Legal cell, as she had been sidetracked by my sister and my brother's accountant. They are lucky I did not take a more serious view of them, impeding my request with a bossy ‘no’. Lawyer Vivek said an executors role is very special and when he spoke about it in the HC the judge lauded him for his stand.

 

An Executor is the person who disposes of or oversees the settlement of the assets of the deceased person in accordance with the wishes of the deceased testator, as enumerated in the Will.  The executor derives the powers to dispose of the estate of the deceased testator in terms of the Will. If there are two executors, there are two minds incharge, so, if one is unreliable the other keeps the dangerous one in check. 

This is how you can ensure that your loved ones receive what is rightfully theirs after your passing. Drafting a Will is perhaps the most effective way to do this. However, it is critical to appoint the right executor.View which of your children are honest with strong ethics and plan in advance. Start by deciding whether you want to opt for an individual or several. Thankfully my parents were not ignorant of my sibling’s greedy desire to acquire it all and put my name in first.

In India, it is common practice to appoint family members or friends as executors. While this is understandable, executing a Will is not easy. It takes time and involves a lot of effort, especially if the assets are large and spread across different areas.

If the estate is simple, restricted to financial assets and real estate, with joint holdings and nominations already in place, and if the family members are amicable, one could choose to have an individual executor. For a complex and large estate, it may be prudent to appoint a corporate executor or several children. I thank God my father and mother put my name in or we would have lost it all.

Here are some good points off a website --- The duties and responsibilities of an Executor

• Meeting of funeral expenses from the estate left by the testator.

• Obtaining the death certificate of the testator.

• Interpretation of the will in the right manner and distribution of assets to the correct beneficiary.

• Drawing up an inventory of the assets to be sold or disposed of.

• Expense management for all the properties until the disposal of the same.

• The official evidence of the executor’s authority is mandated by law.

• The settlement of assets as directed in the will.

• Maintaining records of all transactions.

I never understood the advantages of having an Executor, but I do now.

• Beneficiaries shall be ensured of proper handling of the property.

• If the executor is appointed in time, it shall save time and money and shall prove to be advantageous to the beneficiaries.

• Many cases have been pending in courts due to family disputes which can be avoided by appointing an executor who will be neutral and fair in his dealings. I guess that depends on the executor.

Be relentless in what you do

 

Surely all top athletes and successful people have the words “ Be Relentless” emblazoned across their lives. Some people hear the word relentless and it sparks a fire in their belly and lights them up. Others hear relentless and immediately conjure up images of destruction and mayhem and ruthless Spartan warlords. Good or bad, being relentless is a core part of my being. And it’s a double-edged sword. Or maybe, it’s just one coin with two sides… Relentless means never giving up until you get what you want. Results first. Always. 

Being relentless means getting results and not settling for good or great, instead spending the time on mastering your craft and becoming the best – becoming unstoppable. The really cool thing is that ANYONE can be relentless, but very few people ultimately have what it takes to get there. Because it takes time and effort. It’s about who can stay in the game long enough – who can finish the job. Anyone can start something when it’s new and shiny and exciting, but very few can stomach the grind and keep going in order to finish.

My parents taught being relentless to me -- Be relentless in all you do. So, even though I am in my 60’s, I am relentless and that can make you unpopular.If I take something on -- I will see it through and crush anyone in my path. 

 I taught my sons to do the same in sport and now those guys are relentless in their careers. As young swimmers and triathletes,they were taught to show up,practice hard, work and listen to their tough coaches. They were not satisfied with one practice a day, they hit the pool twice, morning and evening. They were not content with one win but kept pushing until the showcase was covered with their medals and cups. Hours and hours of practice at one thing. They did not slack off. They did not back down when it got too hard. They put in the time, withstood the grind, and now have become unstoppable.

There are 3 ways you can become relentless in pursuit of your goals:

Practice hard:  You don’t have to enjoy it, you’ve just got to do it and love the results. Believe me, I don’t love getting up at six thirty to run 3 kilometers, but I do it because it keeps me healthy. Keeps my dratted blood sugar levels down.

My doctor boy runs 10k whenever he can because as he says “I love being able to beat my last race time and I also love landing in the top spots in my age group”. It sounds so simple, right? Do the work. Put in the time and effort. You’ll get there. The real challenge is being able to combat your voice that tells you to go for the short term reward, instead of pushing through, doing the tough stuff, and going for the long term win. It’s not about winning one championship or writing that novel. That’s great. Being relentless means doing that six more times. And that requires a hell of a lot of work.

Get Obsessive:  I think the question is, “What are you willing to be the best at and give your all to?” You can’t give your all or be extraordinary at everything. What are you choosing to be the best at? Do you want to be the best Mum, the best chef, the best teacher, the best guitarist, the best gardener? In brief moments you can be the best at more than one thing – like when you’re speaking to an audience or telling a story to your grand- kids. But to truly master something, to be the very BEST, you have to get obsessive. One area in your life, one skill, is going to overshadow all the others because that is where you are going to be spending the most time – practicing, studying, analyzing those that have come before you and modeling after them. You will become addicted to learning about that one thing, you become obsessed, and that’s how you become the best.

BE COMFORTABLE BEING ON YOUR OWN: There is an old saying-- it’s lonely at the top. When you’re relentless, you don’t make a whole lot of friends. You’ll have a small inner circle of people you trust and that’s it. You won’t go to office parties and after work drinks with the team or even linger too long in the break room. And you won’t hang out for too long at kid’s birthday parties or family gatherings. You just have your eye on the prize and you’re not going to let anyone get in the way. You’re running your race – fast – and if people want in, they’ve got to get in the race with you and run alongside you. There will be very few people at the finish line with you. And that’s okay.

Everyone has the potential to be relentless, but only a few will actually get to the level of being unstoppable. To achieve success, you must be unwavering in your pursuit of it since life seldom rewards the undeserving. In the instance where success comes naturally, if one is not fully prepared, then easy come easy go.

An unwavering attitude arises from an indomitable will, characterised by a relentless pursuit of excellence. You can be determined in going after a dream, a goal or a plan just as those who diligently toil away at their vocation. To develop persistence soar above your difficulties instead of acquiesce to them. Because, if your resolve is strong nothing can stand in your way to achieve success.

However well intentioned, an unyielding attitude cannot flourish in an impoverished mind. A great attitude blossoms when obstacles are observed as positive feedback that lead to victory. Champions pursue their passion even when they’re less inclined. The novelist who sits down to compose their written prose, may not be motivated to work on that day. Yet, their determination and unrelenting pursuit of mastery compels them to show up and transform their habits into accomplishments.

A relentless outlook can make those around you uncomfortable and lead them to examine their own passion. They may impose their shortcomings on you to appease their indignity. It is no mystery the bigger your dream, the harder it is to reach. This should not discourage you from going after it, despite chipping away at it deliberately and laboriously. My own affirmation is one of “consistent persistence.”

At times, success may show up when you least expect it. There is no overnight success with the determined individual. Behind every rags-to-riches story lies a person who works assiduously to hone their craft. Determined individuals are meticulous with detail and research. They dot their i’s and cross their t’s knowing the devil lies in the details.

They lead from the heart because pursuing their passion is an endeavour that emerges from their core self and not material gain. An uncompromising attitude requires perspective since it is natural to be swept away by success and rest on one’s laurels. Yet, when this happens you lose sight of the factors that contribute to your initial success.

Lastly, to be relentless you must think big and act big and don’t sweat the small stuff!